Downsizing

I am trying to downsize my list of things I have to do. This is to help with the stress and anxiety issues I am having. I will be posting when I feel the need to, or have something to share. I know you all will understand. Don't worry, I won't leave you in the dark! I will post at least once or twice a week. I love you all. :)

Personal

I have a few personal issues going on. Some are physical, some are mental (yeah, yeah...crack the jokes) but I am being serious. Since Bree was born I have struggled with postpartum depression issues. I thought that I was over it and done, but I guess not.

About a month ago I discovered a lump in my right breast. I monitored it for a week or so, then called the doctor and scheduled a visit to the gynecologist. (I needed to have my 'well woman' checkup anyways) The doctor that I had was not very open to hearing about the issues that I had, and didn't even take the time to check out the said lump. She told me that with the location and my age it was "probably nothing". I wasn't happy with that answer.

So I made an appt with my primary care physician on base (which was today), and upon asking me many questions, doing a very thorough exam, and sending me to get blood drawn decided that my hormone levels are still off from when I had Bree. The 'lump' I felt is an enlarged duct which is caused from the hormone imbalance. The anxiety issues I have been having are also related to the hormone imbalance.

So, I am still struggling with a form of postpartum depression that is manifesting itself in anxiety. I do need to go see a psychiatrist as it does affect my daily life and interaction with my kids and husband. I just want to be myself again. I need to be myself again. I can't wait to be myself again.

Two year olds

...are wonderful, joyous, inspiring, silly, crazy, energetic, exhausting, playful, tiring, jumping, singing, dancing, running, hopping bundles of fun. They are like a little bi polar person wrapped up in this tiny little body. One minute they are dancing and yelling happily, next minute they are pushing their sister over and trying to stomp on her hand. Oh the joys of two year olds!

Riley is getting in her two bottom back molars so she has been especially fun lately. She really does have a great sense of humor and can be as cute as a button, but when bedtime rolls around...oh boy! We've tried keeping her up later but nothing seems to stop the hour long yelling and crying that occurs every night. I've been sticking to my guns about the bedtime routine though....she can only have her little lamp on if she needs reading light and once I am out of her room...I don't go back in. (unless she's doing something dangerous of course...like climbing her dresser drawers) I am hoping that these molars come in soon and I can have my usual two year old back. I don't mind the 2 or 3 timeouts a day..but the 9 to 10 everyday are starting to wear on me.

Naptime

Oh how I love naptime! Today we have an extra kiddo because our friends are bringing home their second baby, a boy, home today! Even with an extra kid, I still have all three down for naps at the same time. My two are actually sleeping because they are used to this time, but Grace is fighting it a bit. She's tired, but this is a new environment, new bed, and familiar, but different faces. However, her little eyes are soooo sleepy so I am sure she will be blissfully asleep soon.

Now, I get some quiet time for me. I am going to prep dinner and cut up some veggies to go with the pulled pork I am cooking. We are going to be having pulled pork fajitas with fried peppers and onion with refried beans and chips and salsa on the side. We will be sharing our dinner with Felix and Anneke so they do not have to worry about food tonight...they only need to bask in the glory of bringing home their new baby boy...and feeling complete as a family.

Date night!

I didn't have the time to post on Friday because Adam and I got to go on a date! Adam's mom was in town due to business and she told us to take the night for ourselves. She didn't have to tell us twice! We made sure that we had Bree all ready for bed, and then headed out to our 8:30 reservation at The Melting Pot in Scottsdale. Our four year wedding anniversary is coming up here on February fifth so we figured we'd go out for our anniversary dinner early.

We had a great time! We have been there before so we knew what we were headed into...we enjoyed a multi course dinner complete with cheese fondue, salad, meats of varying kinds, and a delicious chocolate fondue at the end. The chocolate fondue was made with chocolate, caramel, peanut butter and Bailey's....mmmm deeeelicious!!!

Adam and I decided that we need to have more date nights so we made up a plan with some friends of ours to trade off on watching kiddos so that we both can have some good quality time as couples. It was nice to be able to complete a sentence without having to give a warning, or stop a kid from breaking something. I am looking forward to more date nights here soon!